Hope in What is Unseen

Double Rainbow Over The Irish Sea by Nicholas L. Laning

Things have been beyond rough.  Due to discretion, I am not going to be specific about most of the things.  I can say that Saturday morning, as I was driving to go be a part of Transform, a ministry through our church, I was met with the heart breaking news of my Nanna's death.  At first, I was tempted to turn back around and sit at home, but I am glad I didn't.  Being alone would have been bad.  Instead I was comforted greatly with some surprise conversation.  Also, the kind and comforting words of our Pastor, Steve Hardin, went along way.

When Daddy Jake (my granfather) died in February, I wept for days.  It was normal.  It was healthy.  It was a beautiful expression of my affection.  When I heard about Nanna, on top of the seemingly endless list of trials that has come our way lately, I reacted in a way all too familiar to most of you.  I did not weep.  Instead, my brain just stopped.  Too much pain.  Too much sorrow.  Too much stress.  Time to close up shop.  There is no room for me in this life.  I must become hard to survive.  That is the lie that was reaching up from out of the shadows to grip my mind.  Again and again I just did the opposite of what I felt like doing, and I kept praying.  "God, may you be praised in all this.  Please soften my heart.  Please don't let me fall back into the abyss.  Please Father."  And that is when I remembered so many things that helped me get through depression.  Things forgotten, if only in part.  Things we must talk about, like, how to act and believe regardless of what you feel.  To be able to not let your feelings dictate what you believe.  Influence, yes.  Dictate, no.

Or, I had forgotten about the most amazing weapon against depression.  HOPE.  Hoping in things that aren't yet seen.  Years went by with me sulking.  I would hope when I had reason to, when I was shown.  But if I see it, then it isn't hope.  


Romans 8:24-28
24 For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees?  
25 But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.  
26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 
27 And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.  
28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

We cannot wait for things to get better to praise God.  No, it is here, in the middle of the pain, that lies the greatest opportunity for praise.  So, God be praised.  He is wonderful.  He is precious.  He is beautiful, and not later, when things are better, but right now, even through the thick of blinding pain.